{"id":2643,"date":"2025-11-15T20:28:04","date_gmt":"2025-11-15T20:28:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/?p=2643"},"modified":"2025-12-14T17:01:56","modified_gmt":"2025-12-14T17:01:56","slug":"yalniz-birakilan-kadin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/yalniz-birakilan-kadin\/","title":{"rendered":"Yaln\u0131z b\u0131rak\u0131lan kad\u0131n"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

O zarf, yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 de\u011fil; y\u0131llard\u0131r kapal\u0131 kalan bir kap\u0131y\u0131 da a\u00e7m\u0131\u015ft\u0131.<\/p>\n

Adrese bakarken bunun hayat\u0131m\u0131 de\u011fi\u015ftirebilece\u011fini hen\u00fcz bilmiyordum.<\/p>\n

62 ya\u015f\u0131na bast\u0131\u011f\u0131m y\u0131l, hayat\u0131m d\u0131\u015far\u0131dan bak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131nda sakin g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcyordu. Kocam y\u0131llar \u00f6nce vefat etmi\u015fti, \u00e7ocuklar\u0131m kendi d\u00fczenlerini kurmu\u015f, art\u0131k pek u\u011framaz olmu\u015flard\u0131. K\u0131rsalda k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir evde tek ba\u015f\u0131ma ya\u015f\u0131yordum. \u00d6\u011fleden sonralar\u0131 pencere kenar\u0131nda oturup ku\u015f seslerini dinlemeyi, bo\u015f soka\u011f\u0131 seyretmeyi severdim. Sessiz bir hayat\u2026 ama i\u00e7imde hi\u00e7 itiraf etmek istemedi\u011fim bir bo\u015fluk vard\u0131: yaln\u0131zl\u0131k.
\nDo\u011fum g\u00fcn\u00fcmde kimse aramad\u0131, kimse hat\u0131rlamad\u0131. Ne bir mesaj, ne bir kutlama\u2026 Ben de i\u00e7imdeki s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131y\u0131 da\u011f\u0131tmak i\u00e7in otob\u00fcse binip kasabaya gitmeye karar verdim. Plan\u0131m yoktu; sadece uzun zamand\u0131r yapmad\u0131\u011f\u0131m, al\u0131\u015f\u0131lmad\u0131k bir \u015fey yapmak istedim.
\nK\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir kafeye girdim. \u0130\u00e7erisi lo\u015ftu ama \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131 s\u0131cakt\u0131, m\u00fczik yumu\u015fakt\u0131. K\u00f6\u015fedeki bir masaya oturup s\u0131cak bir \u00e7ay s\u00f6yledim. Y\u0131llard\u0131r b\u00f6yle bir ortamda oturmam\u0131\u015ft\u0131m; i\u00e7ti\u011fim \u00e7ay bana hafif bir rahatl\u0131k verdi.
\n\u0130nsanlar\u0131 seyrederken, bir adam yan\u0131ma yakla\u015ft\u0131. K\u0131rkl\u0131 ya\u015flar\u0131nda olmal\u0131yd\u0131; sa\u00e7lar\u0131nda hafif beyazl\u0131klar vard\u0131, bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131 sakindi. Kibarca g\u00fcl\u00fcmsedi:
\n\u201cBir \u00e7ay daha \u0131smarlayabilir miyim?\u201d
\nG\u00fcl\u00fcmsedim. \u201cBana \u2018han\u0131mefendi\u2019 demeyin, gerek yok,\u201d dedim.
\nKonu\u015fmaya ba\u015flad\u0131k ve sanki y\u0131llard\u0131r birbirimizi tan\u0131yormu\u015fuz gibi rahat\u00e7a sohbet ettik. Foto\u011fraf\u00e7\u0131 oldu\u011funu, uzun bir yolculuktan d\u00f6nd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc anlatt\u0131. Ben de ona gen\u00e7li\u011fimi, hayallerimi, yapmaya cesaret edemedi\u011fim yolculuklar\u0131 anlatt\u0131m. Hem konu\u015fmas\u0131 hem bak\u0131\u015f\u0131 beni tuhaf bir \u015fekilde \u00e7ekiyordu.
\nGece onunla birlikte bir otele gittim. Y\u0131llar sonra ilk defa birinin s\u0131cakl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hissettim. Fazla konu\u015fmad\u0131k; sadece o an\u0131n duygusuna kap\u0131ld\u0131k.
\nSabah g\u00fcne\u015f ince perdelerden s\u00fcz\u00fcl\u00fcrken uyand\u0131m. Yan\u0131ma d\u00f6n\u00fcp g\u00fcnayd\u0131n demek istedim ama yatak bo\u015ftu. Yast\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u00fczerindeki hafif \u00e7ukur d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda ondan kalan hi\u00e7bir \u015fey yoktu.
\nBa\u015fucumda k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir zarf duruyordu. Elleri titreyerek a\u00e7t\u0131m.
\nO notu okudu\u011fum an, bunun s\u0131radan bir gecenin sonu olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hissettim.<\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131l\u0131 olan adres, beni hi\u00e7 planlamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m bir yola \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131yordu.<\/p>\n

Zarf\u0131 titreyen ellerimle a\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131mda i\u00e7inden tek bir not d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc. K\u00e2\u011f\u0131d\u0131n k\u00f6\u015feleri hafif\u00e7e k\u0131vr\u0131lm\u0131\u015ft\u0131, belli ki uzun s\u00fcredir yan\u0131nda ta\u015f\u0131yordu. El yaz\u0131s\u0131 \u00f6zenliydi ama aceleyle yaz\u0131lm\u0131\u015f gibi bir tela\u015f sakl\u0131yd\u0131.<\/p>\n

\u201cD\u00fcn gece g\u00f6zlerinizde \u00f6yle bir s\u0131cakl\u0131k g\u00f6rd\u00fcm ki, y\u0131llard\u0131r unuttu\u011fumu sand\u0131\u011f\u0131m bir duyguyu yeniden hat\u0131rlad\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Bende b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131z etkiyi anlatacak kelime bulam\u0131yorum.
\nGitmek zorunday\u0131m\u2026 ama kalbimin bir k\u0131sm\u0131 sizde kald\u0131.
\nE\u011fer bir g\u00fcn sizi yeniden g\u00f6rmek isterseniz, beni burada bulabilirsiniz.\u201d<\/p>\n

Alt\u0131nda k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir adres vard\u0131:
\n\u201cG\u00fcm\u00fc\u015fdere Mah. Eski Fener Yolu, No: 11\u201d<\/p>\n

Adresin yaz\u0131l\u0131 oldu\u011fu o sat\u0131ra dokunurken i\u00e7imde uzun y\u0131llard\u0131r hissetmedi\u011fim bir heyecan k\u0131p\u0131rdad\u0131.
\nKalbim sanki gen\u00e7li\u011fimdeki gibi h\u0131zla \u00e7arp\u0131yordu.<\/p>\n

O an anlad\u0131m:
\nBu bulu\u015fma bir tesad\u00fcf de\u011fildi.
\nBir gecelik bir r\u00fczg\u00e2r de\u011fil\u2026
\nSanki hayat bana yeniden ba\u015flamam i\u00e7in bir f\u0131rsat veriyordu.<\/p>\n

G\u00fcnlerce adresi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm.
\nGitmeye cesaretim var m\u0131yd\u0131?
\nBunca y\u0131l yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011fa al\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015fken bir kalbe tekrar dokunmak beni korkutuyordu.<\/p>\n

Ama her sabah penceremin \u00f6n\u00fcnde oturdu\u011fumda, ku\u015flar\u0131n sesi bile ona dair bir \u015feyler hat\u0131rlat\u0131yordu.
\nKafedeki g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u00fc\u2026
\nS\u00f6zlerindeki s\u0131cakl\u0131k\u2026
\nYan\u0131mda uyuyan insan\u0131n verdi\u011fi uzun zamand\u0131r unuttu\u011fum o g\u00fcven duygusu\u2026<\/p>\n

Ve sonunda bir sabah, g\u00fcne\u015f da\u011flar\u0131n ard\u0131ndan yava\u015f\u00e7a y\u00fckselirken, i\u00e7imden bir ses f\u0131s\u0131ldad\u0131:<\/p>\n

\u201cGit.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u00c7antam\u0131 ald\u0131m ve kasaban\u0131n yoluna koyuldum.<\/p>\n

G\u00fcm\u00fc\u015fdere Mahallesi\u2019ne vard\u0131\u011f\u0131mda sokak, hafif r\u00fczg\u00e2rla sallanan a\u011fa\u00e7 yapraklar\u0131n\u0131n \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131\u011f\u0131 sesle doluydu.
\nEski Fener Yolu\u2026
\nEvin numaras\u0131 yakla\u015ft\u0131k\u00e7a kalbim ad\u0131mlar\u0131m\u0131 ge\u00e7ti.<\/p>\n

No: 11\u2019in \u00f6n\u00fcnde durdum.<\/p>\n

Kap\u0131 eskimi\u015f ama \u00f6zenle boyanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Pencerede sarma\u015f\u0131klar vard\u0131. Sanki y\u0131llard\u0131r biri bu evi sevgiyle korumu\u015f gibiydi.<\/p>\n

Kap\u0131ya do\u011fru uzanacak cesareti buldu\u011fum an, i\u00e7eriden gelen ayak sesleri duydum.<\/p>\n

Kap\u0131 yava\u015f\u00e7a a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131.<\/p>\n

Ve i\u015fte oradayd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Elinde foto\u011fraf makinesi, g\u00f6zleri \u015fa\u015fk\u0131nl\u0131kla a\u00e7\u0131lm\u0131\u015f, ama y\u00fcz\u00fcnde o tan\u0131d\u0131k s\u0131cak g\u00fcl\u00fcmsemeyle bana bak\u0131yordu.<\/p>\n

\u201cGelece\u011finizi ummu\u015ftum,\u201d dedi, sesi yumu\u015fac\u0131k.<\/p>\n

Ben yaln\u0131zca f\u0131s\u0131ldayabildim:
\n\u201cUmar\u0131m\u2026 ge\u00e7 kalmam\u0131\u015f\u0131md\u0131r.\u201d<\/p>\n

O an, y\u0131llard\u0131r kurumu\u015f sand\u0131\u011f\u0131m kalbimin i\u00e7inde bir \u015fey usulca filizlendi.<\/p>\n

Bu sefer ka\u00e7an o de\u011fil, benim oraya geli\u015fimdi.
\nVe bu defa hi\u00e7bir \u015fey yar\u0131m kalmayacakt\u0131.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

O zarf, yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 de\u011fil; y\u0131llard\u0131r kapal\u0131 kalan bir kap\u0131y\u0131 da a\u00e7m\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Adrese bakarken bunun hayat\u0131m\u0131 de\u011fi\u015ftirebilece\u011fini hen\u00fcz bilmiyordum. 62 ya\u015f\u0131na bast\u0131\u011f\u0131m y\u0131l, hayat\u0131m d\u0131\u015far\u0131dan bak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131nda […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2643","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2643","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2643"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2643\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3711,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2643\/revisions\/3711"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2643"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2643"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2643"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}