{"id":3960,"date":"2025-12-18T18:47:49","date_gmt":"2025-12-18T18:47:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/?p=3960"},"modified":"2025-12-18T18:48:21","modified_gmt":"2025-12-18T18:48:21","slug":"her-gun-ise-giderken-yolumun-uzerinde-oturan-evsiz-bir-adama-birkac-lira-verirdim","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/her-gun-ise-giderken-yolumun-uzerinde-oturan-evsiz-bir-adama-birkac-lira-verirdim\/","title":{"rendered":"Her g\u00fcn i\u015fe giderken yolumun \u00fczerinde oturan evsiz bir adama birka\u00e7 lira verirdim"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

\u0130lk bayram\u0131m<\/strong> \u2014 e\u015fimi \u00fc\u00e7 ay \u00f6nce kanserden kaybetmi\u015f bir dul olarak \u2014 sessiz ve \u00f6ng\u00f6r\u00fclebilir<\/strong> ge\u00e7meliydi: k\u00fct\u00fcphanede \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak, ak\u015fam bo\u015f eve d\u00f6nmek, ertesi g\u00fcn ayn\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 tekrarlamak. Ancak k\u00fct\u00fcphane kap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n yan\u0131ndaki bankta her sabah sandvi\u00e7 verdi\u011fim o ya\u015fl\u0131 adam<\/strong>, birka\u00e7 kelimeyle hayat\u0131m\u0131 alt\u00fcst etti. Arife g\u00fcn\u00fc bana f\u0131s\u0131ldad\u0131: \u201cL\u00fctfen bug\u00fcn eve gitme.\u201d<\/strong> O s\u00f6z\u00fcn ard\u0131ndan gelen zarfl\u0131 mektup<\/strong>, e\u015fimin ge\u00e7mi\u015fine dair sars\u0131c\u0131 bir ger\u00e7ek<\/strong> ve bana d\u00fc\u015fen bir sorumluluk, t\u00fcm d\u00fcnyam\u0131 de\u011fi\u015ftirdi.
(K\u0131sa \u00f6zet: Dul bir kad\u0131n\u0131n ilk bayram\u0131nda banktaki yabanc\u0131\u2014bir mektup, bir son istek, bir g\u00f6rev.)<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Ben Zeynep. 35 ya\u015f\u0131nday\u0131m. Sekiz y\u0131ll\u0131k evlili\u011fin ard\u0131ndan son iki y\u0131l, kelimelerin ac\u0131mas\u0131zla\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir d\u00f6nemdi: kemoterapi, tetkikler, hastane koridorlar\u0131\u2026 Sonunda bir sabah e\u015fim uyanmad\u0131. Cenazeden sonra k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck evimiz bir dekor gibiydi; ceketi, ayakkab\u0131lar\u0131, di\u015f f\u0131r\u00e7as\u0131 \u2014 her \u015fey geri d\u00f6necekmi\u015f gibi duruyordu. Ama bor\u00e7lar, faturalar ve ger\u00e7e\u011fin so\u011fuk bo\u015flu\u011fu ortadayd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Ayakta kalmak i\u00e7in kasaba k\u00fct\u00fcphanesinde yard\u0131mc\u0131 g\u00f6revli olarak \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmaya ba\u015flad\u0131m. Sessiz bir i\u015f; kitaplar\u0131 rafa diziyor, yaz\u0131c\u0131 s\u0131k\u0131\u015fmalar\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131yor, aralarda a\u011flamamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yordum. Bankta oturan o ya\u015fl\u0131 adam\u0131 ilk hafta sadece g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Gri sa\u00e7l\u0131, y\u00fcn bereli, eskimi\u015f ceketli\u2026 Parmaklar\u0131nda a\u00e7\u0131k eldivenler, \u00f6n\u00fcnde katlanm\u0131\u015f bir gazete.<\/p>\n

\u0130kinci hafta cebimde birka\u00e7 lira bulunca onu payla\u015fmak istedim. Sandvi\u00e7 getirdim; o iki eliyle ald\u0131 ve \u201cKendine iyi bak, k\u0131z\u0131m,\u201d<\/strong> dedi. O k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck rit\u00fcelimiz k\u0131sa s\u00fcrede sabahlar\u0131ma n\u00fcfuz etti. Otob\u00fcsten inerken sandvi\u00e7i ve \u00e7ay\u0131 uzatmak, insanlar\u0131n \u201c\u00e7ok g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fcs\u00fcn\u201d laflar\u0131ndan daha teselli ediciydi. Her defas\u0131nda ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 sallard\u0131: \u201cKendine iyi bak, k\u0131z\u0131m.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Arife g\u00fcn\u00fc so\u011fuktu. Evde bir polar battaniye, termoslu \u00e7ay, po\u015fete konmu\u015f kurabiyelerle bank\u0131n yan\u0131na gittim. Adam yine oradayd\u0131; bu kez gazetesi yoktu, omuzlar\u0131 daha d\u00fc\u015f\u00fck, elleri daha titrek. Battaniyeyi dizlerine serdim, termosu uzatt\u0131m. Ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 kald\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131nda y\u00fcz\u00fcndeki ifade beni durdurdu: korku<\/strong>, ger\u00e7ek bir korku.<\/p>\n

Sonra s\u00f6yledi: \u201cL\u00fctfen bug\u00fcn eve gitme.\u201d<\/strong>
\u0130\u00e7imden bir \u015fey \u00e7\u00f6kt\u00fc. \u201cAd\u0131m\u0131 sana hi\u00e7 s\u00f6ylemedim,\u201d<\/strong> dedim. \u201cBeni nereden tan\u0131yorsun?\u201d<\/strong> Yutkundu. \u201cK\u0131z karde\u015finin yan\u0131nda kal. Bu gece evinde uyuma.\u201d<\/strong> dedi. S\u00f6zleri anla\u015f\u0131lmaz bir ciddiyet ta\u015f\u0131yordu. \u201cYar\u0131n anlat\u0131r\u0131m,\u201d<\/strong> diye ekledi, \u201cBunu b\u00f6yle \u00f6\u011frenmeni istemezdim. Daha \u00e7ok can\u0131n\u0131 yakar.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

O gece k\u0131z karde\u015fimin mahallesine gittim. Kap\u0131y\u0131 pijamas\u0131yla a\u00e7t\u0131; soru sormadan i\u00e7eri ald\u0131. Neredeyse hi\u00e7 uyumadan ge\u00e7en bir gece oldu. Ertesi sabah k\u00fct\u00fcphaneye d\u00f6nd\u00fcm. Bankta o vard\u0131; gazetesi yoktu. \u201cBana g\u00fcvendi\u011fin i\u00e7in te\u015fekk\u00fcr ederim,\u201d<\/strong> dedi. Yan\u0131na oturdum; art\u0131k anlatacakt\u0131.<\/p>\n

Adam\u0131n anlatt\u0131klar\u0131 ba\u015fta inan\u0131lmazd\u0131. E\u015fimle ilgili, y\u0131llar \u00f6ncesine dayanan ayr\u0131nt\u0131lar\u0131 bildi\u011fini kan\u0131tlad\u0131. S\u00f6yledi\u011fi k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck ayr\u0131nt\u0131lar \u2014 kimsenin bilmedi\u011fi \u015feyler \u2014 do\u011fruydu. Sonra ger\u00e7ek a\u00e7\u0131\u011fa \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131: E\u015fim y\u0131llar \u00f6nce d\u00fcnyaya gelmi\u015f bir \u00e7ocu\u011fu vard\u0131<\/strong> ve o \u00e7ocuk art\u0131k yaln\u0131zd\u0131. Sosyal hizmetler haberdar olmu\u015ftu. Banktaki adam, beni o gece evde b\u0131rakmamak i\u00e7in oradayd\u0131 \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc bu haberin bana ula\u015faca\u011f\u0131 an\u0131 yumu\u015fatmak istemi\u015fti.<\/p>\n

Elime bir zarf verdi. \u0130\u00e7inde bir mektup vard\u0131 \u2014 e\u015fimin el yaz\u0131s\u0131yla:
\u201cSen benim evimdin. Zaman\u0131m yetmedi. E\u011fer kalbini a\u00e7abilirsen minnettar olurum. A\u00e7amazsan da, seni sevmi\u015f olmaktan pi\u015fman de\u011filim.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mektubu g\u00f6\u011fs\u00fcme bast\u0131rd\u0131m. Sonra resmi ka\u011f\u0131tlar\u2026 belgeler. Adam\u0131n elindeki belgeler sosyal hizmetlerin notlar\u0131, \u00e7ocu\u011fun durumu hakk\u0131nda raporlar ve \u2014 arad\u0131\u011f\u0131m a\u00e7\u0131klama: e\u015fimin ge\u00e7mi\u015fiyle ilgili somut bilgiler. O gece bana verdi\u011fi tek somut \u00f6\u011f\u00fct: Kap\u0131 \u00e7alarsa a\u00e7; y\u00fczle\u015f.<\/strong> Ben de \u00f6yle yapt\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Banktaki adam, y\u0131llarca a\u011f\u0131r a\u011f\u0131r y\u00fcr\u00fcyen biriydi; ama o gece kararl\u0131 ad\u0131mlarla uzakla\u015ft\u0131. Bana ad\u0131m\u0131, k\u0131z karde\u015fimi, e\u015fimin ad\u0131n\u0131 bilmi\u015f olmas\u0131n\u0131n nedeni a\u00e7\u0131kt\u0131: hayatlarda arada s\u0131rada beliren bu yabanc\u0131lar, g\u00f6r\u00fcnd\u00fcklerinden daha fazla ba\u011fa sahip olabiliyorlard\u0131. Adam beni izledi\u011fini, beni korumak istedi\u011fini s\u00f6yledi. \u201cS\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc tuttum,\u201d<\/strong> dedi. Bana verdi\u011fi mektup ve \u00f6\u011f\u00fct, yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131ma bir muhatap, kederime bir k\u00f6pr\u00fc koydu.<\/p>\n

Sonras\u0131nda ne yapt\u0131m? \u00d6nce kap\u0131y\u0131 a\u00e7t\u0131m. Konu\u015fmay\u0131 se\u00e7tim; o \u00e7ocu\u011fu yok saymad\u0131m. \u201c\u015eimdi eve gidiyorum,\u201d dedim ya\u015fl\u0131 adama. \u201cVe kap\u0131 \u00e7al\u0131nd\u0131\u011f\u0131nda a\u00e7aca\u011f\u0131m.\u201d Derin bir nefes ald\u0131. \u201cKendine iyi bak, k\u0131z\u0131m,\u201d<\/strong> dedi. Bu kez kelimeler i\u00e7ime daha derin i\u015fledi. \u201cDeneyece\u011fim,\u201d<\/strong> dedim. \u201cVe e\u011fer yapabilirsem\u2026 o \u00e7ocu\u011fa da bakaca\u011f\u0131m.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Keder h\u00e2l\u00e2 a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131. Ama art\u0131k yaln\u0131z de\u011fildim: bir mektup, bir \u00e7ocuk ve arife g\u00fcn\u00fc s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc tutan bir yabanc\u0131 vard\u0131. Banktaki adam\u0131n, k\u00fct\u00fcphane bank\u0131na b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131 o sessiz rit\u00fcel; bana, yas\u0131n ortas\u0131nda bile insan ili\u015fkilerinin ve g\u00fcvenin hayatta kalma g\u00fcc\u00fcn\u00fc hat\u0131rlatt\u0131. Bir yabanc\u0131n\u0131n \u201cL\u00fctfen bug\u00fcn eve gitme\u201d demesi, bir kad\u0131n\u0131n kap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7mas\u0131 ve bir mektubun getirdi\u011fi ger\u00e7ek, hayat\u0131m\u0131 de\u011fi\u015ftirdi.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u0130lk bayram\u0131m \u2014 e\u015fimi \u00fc\u00e7 ay \u00f6nce kanserden kaybetmi\u015f bir dul olarak \u2014 sessiz ve \u00f6ng\u00f6r\u00fclebilir ge\u00e7meliydi: k\u00fct\u00fcphanede \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak, ak\u015fam bo\u015f eve d\u00f6nmek, ertesi g\u00fcn […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3963,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3960","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3960","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3960"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3960\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3965,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3960\/revisions\/3965"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3963"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3960"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3960"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bilgitarif.com\/iyi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3960"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}